Legends about polyamorous relationships

What do polyamory and what non-monogamous relationships consist of? And it is that polyamory and non-monogamous relationships are receiving more and more attention from the media and are beginning to be discussed more frequently. However, these relational models are not something new. But there are still many myths that exist about this type of relationship. In this latest post, we will talk about some of the myths that surround non-monogamous relationships. Continue reading this post on the Escort Service Website.

First myth: monogamy is natural.

In nature, there is an excellent variety of ways of organizing and relating, both monogamous and non-monogamous. Thus, some species are contained in monogamous pairs for life, as in some birds, for example, penguins, and other communities are organized in non-monogamy, such as the bonobos.

As for human beings, the monogamous model has prevailed in Western societies for centuries, but this does not necessarily mean it is natural. In fact, in the case of human beings, it would be more of a question of social and cultural organization. In other parts of the world, there are societies and cultures in which the organization is non-monogamous.

Some examples of this, whose organization is also matriarchal, are the Mosuo ethnic group in China and the Wodaabe tribe in West Africa.
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Second myth:

If you want to be with another person, it is because you do not love your partner or something is wrong in the relationship. It is common to hear the idea that if you look at people other than your partner, it is because something is wrong in your relationship. This belief is based on myths of romantic love, such as that of the other half, which ensures that there is only one person to whom we are predestined.

The myth of exclusivity, and that the couple must cover all our needs and complement us. But the reality is that we can feel desire and love for other people when we are comfortable with a partner and continue to love them.

Myth 3: Non-monogamous relationships are consensual infidelity.

Consensual non-monogamous relationships are based, as the name suggests, on consensus. All the people involved in the relationship must have information about the situation and choose it freely and by consensus. Choosing it freely means wanting to be in a relationship of these characteristics out of your desire, conviction and by your own decision, without external pressure or coercion.

The situations in which an open relationship is agreed upon to prevent the partner from leaving the relationship are not situations in which this model is chosen because they want to be in a relationship of this type but to avoid a greater evil. In these situations, there is information and even consensus to a certain extent, but they are not chosen out of desire and conviction, which can end up causing suffering to some of the parties.

All this is different from infidelity, in which there is no consensus and on many occasions, one of the people involved lacks information.

Myth 4: Non-monogamous people are incapable of commitment.

Non-monogamous relationships imply the establishment of several affective, sexual or loving bonds with more significant, lesser or the same degree of responsibility. Especially non-monogamous relationships that involve love or affection bonds beyond openness on a sexual level are usually based on the importance of care and effective responsibility. With this, it is possible to establish relationships that imply commitment with more than one person at a time.

Myth 5: Non-monogamous people are promiscuous and have more sexually transmitted infections.

Having sexual relations with a greater or lesser number of partners does not depend so much on relational orientation but on how a person is. Polyamorous relationships, in particular, are often based more on loving bonds than on having sex with many people. Within polyamory, there are also poly faithful relationships between three or more people with exclusivity.

And as for sexually transmitted infections, the possibility of transmission does not depend on the number or type of practices carried out but on the use of barrier methods (condoms, latex quadrants, etc.). The use of infection prevention methods is often a major topic discussed and agreed upon in most non-monogamous relationships.

Myth 6: People in non-monogamous relationships don’t feel jealous.

People in non-monogamous relationships can feel jealous, just like people in monogamous relationships. The question is not whether they feel jealousy or not, but how to manage these emotions, going to their source, working on insecurities and trusting in our bonds.

Myth 7: Non-monogamous relationships have to be symmetrical.

There is the idea that the agreements in non-monogamous relationships have to be the same for everyone involved because if not, it is not fair. But the arrangements can be established based on the wishes and needs of each person involved, without this meaning that they are less appropriate agreements but adjusted to what each one wants from the relationship. An example of this could be mono-poly relationships, where one partner is polyamorous, and the other is monogamous because they want and agree to be.

These are just some of the myths that exist about non-monogamous relationships. As in all relationships, there is no right and wrong model of non-monogamy. The key would be to adapt our relationships to our desires and needs, taking care of the wants and conditions of the other people involved rather than adjusting ourselves to a rigid relational model, whether monogamous or non-monogamous. That is, choose the relationships that make us happier in a free, informed and consensual way.