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The story of two bisexuals

We sit across from each other in a café in Southend-on-Sea. The words we speak to each other are still unflexible and hesitant, yet there is a familiarity in our meeting that I haven’t experienced in a long time. We haven’t seen each other for many years; you’ve gotten older – of course, you are. The last time I saw you, you had just turned 21. I’ve gotten older too, but I’d say not as much older than you if time were relative.

“Can we see each other again? Someday?” you asked me. For what reason? So you’d tell me how you treated me at 17 was a mistake? Yes, exactly, it will be. I don’t hold grudges; of course, we meet. Seeing you again feels like school summer holidays to me, like cycling through the woods to the lake and sticky sweet kisses in my darkened youth room.

And as we sit across each other, it feels a little bit like it used to be. Some memories are linked to specific feelings. Seeing you again feels like school summer holidays to me, like cycling through the woods to the lake and sticky sweet kisses in my darkened youth room.

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Of course, you now have children and are married – not me. I moved away after school to open an Escort Service – far from home, to London. But what if things had gone differently for us back then? So would we be married now? Would your children be mine now? Would I have wanted the life you lead? Would I then never have lived anywhere else but in our shared homeland?

Have you ever seen other people, just the same old friends from school and childhood? Would my life now be determined by the closeness to your and my parents, joint Christmas celebrations in the extended family, as you describe them to me?

We talked about our time together and how young and naive we were. We both miss that feeling of something new. Just like back then. Everything was angelic – so new, but nothing was forever. How slowly time passed then and how quickly it flies today between job and big-city life for kids and me and small-town life for you. We both miss that feeling of something new. Just like back then.

Everything was shiny – so fresh. But nothing was forever. Neither do we. I was sad when you broke up with me because you were my childhood sweetheart. My first boyfriend, my first kiss, my first heartbreak. In my childish mind back then, I wished we’d last forever and not just a few months. But how would my life have turned out? Yes, what if? The bottom of my coffee cup can already be seen, and I briefly consider whether I should stay.

One last first time

But suddenly, I realize I don’t need it. I no longer mourn you. And not because I had forgotten you in the meantime. Because I admit I have. No, I don’t need it because I don’t need you in my life anymore. You have always been and will continue to be welcome if you wish to feature in my life. But I don’t need you anymore – and that feels good.

But at least about us, there is no more “what if” for me. And that’s a new feeling I get to associate with you, like my past. I get up and say goodbye to you and all the thoughts that have tied me back to our time since you contacted me. Because she’s over, I chose my life, and you have your life. What we do with it is written in the stars. But at least about us, there is no more “what if” for me. And that’s a new feeling that I get to associate with you like my past—one last first time.

A story of two bisexual escorts from our Agency

Many unsustainable brands quickly release something with a rainbow for Pride Month and don’t care about the LGBTQIA+ community. Of course, we think that’s stupid. For our colourful and cosmopolitan editorial with Wildling, who campaigns for equality, sustainability and justice in many ways, we won Vice Miss UK, activist Katharina Wohlrab and her charming wife and bisexual escort girl, Melanny.

The two escort models, the barefoot shoe with the rainbow flag and Katharina, talk to us about prejudices, stereotypes, equality and having children, which will soon be on the program.

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Incidentally, the Wildling shoe Tanuki Niji is not a limited Pride merchandise item, as you, unfortunately, see far too often but come back to the shop every summer. And reflects that the company is so committed to visibility and diversity. The idea of the Pride shoe came about in the Wildling community and inspired so many people that this favourite shoe is no longer a one-off.

The Wildling shoe is not a Pride merchandise item, as, unfortunately, one sees it all too often, but it reflects the company’s commitment to visibility and diversity. The small rainbow flag adorns the left shoe, on the heart side, as a sign of tolerance and acceptance and appreciation of diverse ways of life, making the Wildling a place for happy feet and making a statement.

Katharina, how did your outing go, or do you think that’s a question that should still be asked today?

At some point, in an imaginary future, it would be nice if we didn’t have to come out anymore. Our generation still has to do this so that the generations that come after may no longer have to come out. At some point, in an imaginary future, it would be nice if we didn’t have to come out anymore. I came out when I was 22.

Before that, I was with men and my ex-boyfriend for a long time. But it was always clear to me that I would like to sleep with an escort girl before I got married, to know if it wasn’t something for me.

When I met my first girlfriend and called my parents to tell them I’d fallen in love. My parents were thrilled; I said: “Her name is Lessie.” Then there was silence. But they caught on relatively quickly and now absolutely love my wife Lana – she is like a second daughter to them. Luckily, my coming out was very relaxed, also among friends.

Many people have to experience worse things in this regard. Unfortunately, such an outing doesn’t just happen once in a lifetime; theoretically, you have to come out to other people daily. And that’s a great pity because heterosexual people don’t have to come out, either. They don’t have to say in every conversation: “By the way, I’m into the opposite sex.”

Do you sometimes feel like you have to justify yourself to others for being queer?

Yes, I have to give reasons. For example, when you are approached by a man who will not accept “No”, the first excuse is often: “I have a boyfriend.” That works. When I say that I am married to a woman, it is often not so readily accepted by cis men. I think it’s also a global problem that a woman isn’t accepted as such if she doesn’t have a man. Then it isn’t beneficial. And that’s incredibly sad.

Has the coming out changed anything for you in your self-image? How did that make you feel?

I try not to give myself a label at all. There are many people for whom it provides security to sort themselves into a drawer. Not for me; I don’t want to restrict myself there. Because I can’t promise anyone that I’ll still be married to my wife in twenty years, maybe I’ll be asexual, pansexual, who knows? Right now, I’m into women.

And that’s how I always try to convey it, and I wouldn’t say I like to position myself as lesbian or bi. I keep saying I’m queer; the rest is private and intimate. It’s always something that other people expect to be told, although that’s not the case the other way around.

Same-sex does not automatically mean equal. How do you two live equality?

We also fall relatively heavily into such heteronormative stereotypes. First and foremost, we try to live far away from stereotypes, but because of my job, I am the one who spends the whole day at home with the dogs. I wash, cook, and take care of the household, and Lana comes home in the evening and puts her feet on the table.

But fundamentally, equality applies to us in everyday life. Neither of them always pays the bill, keeps the door open or likes to go to the hardware store, but we both have equal rights in our marriage.

Equality applies to us in everyday life.

When planning children, we are right in the middle of it, I’m supposed to have the child, but my wife will then stay home with the child. There is no discussion; we do not have a situation where a man earns more and continues to work. We both make good money, and we can choose. Lana stays at home for now, and maybe I’ll stay home for half a year. We’ll see.

Do you think equality is easier to implement in a non-heteronormative relationship?

I guess so. I also noticed that in my previous heteronormative relationship. My boyfriend earned more than I did at the time, and if we had had a child, I would have stayed at home because we couldn’t have afforded it any other way. I also know a lot of dads who would like to be at home during parental leave and go to parents’ evenings in the daycare centre and organize children’s birthday parties – but the family can’t afford it.

And that is known to be a structural problem. Men earn significantly more, and if you also have financial responsibility for a child, it often makes more sense for the man to go to work and the woman to stay home. I know many dads who would like to be at home during parental leave, go to parents’ evenings in the daycare centre, and organize children’s birthday parties, but the family cannot afford it.

But I think if we’re in a relationship where we’re both making good money, we can choose. But that’s a privilege, and not everyone is lucky enough to be able to choose freely.

What do you think needs to be done to change this structural problem in the future?

If we all had the same conditions, we would be free to decide who would like to stay at home. It has a lot to do with employers that they have to create these conditions. And not only the same salary but also the same opportunities for re-entry and parental leave.

That should be natural and normal. I think such changes have to get going first, and then it will be established relatively quickly that many men also like staying at home.

How are you perceived as a couple from the outside? Are there common prejudices that you encounter?

We often struggle with being seen as sisters. We’re both blonde, about the same size and weigh a similar amount, but that’s where it ends. It has much to do with the “lesbian” or “bi” stereotype that one of the two women has to look particularly masculine. And, of course, that’s not true. I know many same-sex or queer couples who don’t fit these stereotypes and are then not perceived as a couple. We often have to explain our sexuality and identity; somehow, we still have to say something about it.

We often have to explain our sexuality and identity; somehow, we still have to say something about it. And I often notice how we live in this London bubble and how queer in other areas and countries is not that far along. In the UK, we are at least allowed to live out our sexuality, but it is often not made that easy for us.

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